Pensieve
by Messrs Padfoot and Prongs
Summary: Whether or not she likes it, Lily is forced to study more than her school subjects by her friend. Dumbledore doesn't seem to have time to talk to her, no matter how much time he has got for others. And is Potter actually walking away from her?
1. Chapter 1

Here comes a new story for you all to read!

Disclaimer: I own nothing!

* * *

_The day was smiling. The sun shone and gave warmth to everyone outside. Lily was having a picnic in the park with her father and her mother. They were sitting beside a lake and the ducks and swans swam around peacefully. Her parents were enjoying a glass of red wine and talked happily with each other. The smiles on their faces showed that they still loved each other, even after all those years together. _

_Lily herself was drawing whatever she could see. She had just finished drawing the swans and now she was on the look for something new to draw. On a bench nearby there was an old man sitting. He didn't do anything. He just sat there. Lily looked at his wrinkles and his long beard. It was easy to see the man was old. _

_Fifteen minutes later the drawing was finished. Lily was quite pleased with the outcome. The eight year old girl got her parents attention and asked them if she could give the drawing to the old man. Her parents looked at it, warm smiles still on their faces, and said yes, she could give the drawing to the man._

_With light feet Lily half jumped over to the old man, her steps more uneasy as she approached him. _

"_Excuse me?" The man looked at her through his spectacles. His eyes were friendly. _

"_Yes, what may I help you with?" The man asked. _

_Lily held out her drawing to him. "This is a drawing of you. I want you to have it," she said. The man took the drawing, said "thank you, Lily", and then he walked away._

_

* * *

_

It is strange how memories suddenly come out from their hidden place at the strangest of times. Lily was sitting in the library studying for a test when this memory appeared. She was quite stressed out and really hadn't time to think of the past. It was weird how her mind suddenly didn't want to listen to her.

Looking back at the memory she couldn't help but think it was one of her most happy ones. It being one of her most happy ones had nothing to do with the fact that Petunia hadn't been with them there that day, it had to do with the feeling she had whenever she thought of it. It was a calm memory and she cherished it very much.

She was about to start reading again when she hear a familiar voice. "What are you thinking about now, flower?"

Without even thinking about it Lily closed the book and put her things into her bag. It had become a habit by now. Whenever she heard Potters voice she would automatically clean whatever she was doing and go as fast as she could to the girls' dorm to continue her work there. The reason she didn't sit in her dorm all the time was that she didn't really like to work there. And it would be boring to say that the place you spent the most of your school days was your dorm, wouldn't it?

Ignoring the person with the voice was also something she had started to without thinking. Thought it wasn't always too easy as the voice never stopped to speak when it first started. One time Potter had actually had a monologue with her for an hour before she said one word: "bye", but she usually couldn't keep on ignoring him for that long.

"Dumbledore," she said simply. It had been a few months into first year she had recognized their headmaster. She had been in his office because of Potter, naturally, and had seen the drawing hanging on the wall in front of his desk.

* * *

"_I like to look at that drawing from __time to time, you see." The headmaster told her. "It reminds me of that day in the park."_

_Lily had looked closely on the headmaster then. He had more wrinkles than he had at their first meeting. "You looked like a lonely granddad" Lily said in the manner children speak their sudden thoughts. _

"_Did I now?" The headmaster asked, more to himself than to Lily. But she nodded her head before walking closer to the drawing. _

"_I can draw a lot better now, you know," she praised herself. "Maybe I should draw you again sometime!" _

_At this the headmaster had smiled and told her that that would be a good idea, but he wanted her to do it sometime later as he had things to do at the time._

_

* * *

_

As she walked out of the library Potter followed her like a stray dog. She hardly even noticed as she was almost too used to it. "I still haven't drawn that drawing," she mumbled to herself.

"What was that, Evans?" Potter asked.

Still walking Lily told him that she had promised the headmaster to draw him before she graduated.

"You can draw me whenever you like, flower. I wouldn't mind you take a closer look at me," Potter requested and winked. Lily knew _he _wouldn't mind, but she on the other hand? It wasn't even an option. She chose to ignore his words.

* * *

"_Flower, could you please come here for a minute?" _Her father's voice echoed in her mind.

"_What is it daddy?" Lily was by her father's side in a matter of seconds. She could hear from his voice that there was something she would find interesting that he was about to show her. _

"_Here," he said, holding a camera in front of him, "look into this hole." Through the camera lens a new world opened up for Lily. It was the same world she was used to, but it looked a bit different. "Try to take a picture, flower." And she did. The twenty-four pictures she could take were taken the next hour. After her father had gone to the shop and the pictures were ready they all saw that the angles of the pictures were off and she hadn't been able to get all of the motives into the picture, but they were Lily's pictures. No one could take that away from her._

_

* * *

_

The last few years Lily hadn't been taking many pictures. But she still enjoyed taking them when she first got around doing it.

"Flower?"

Lily jumped at the sound. She had been so engrossed in her memory that she had forgotten Potter who was still walking beside her, along with the fact that she was walking. Hearing a different person than her father say her nick-name caught her off guard. She knew she should be used to the fact that Potter used her father's old nick-name for her by now, but still she forgot about it from time to time.

"Flower?" Potter asked again.

"What?"

"Why do you ignore me so much?" Potter asked quietly. This quietness surprised Lily as he usually never lowered his voice. She stopped and looked at him.

"Give me one reason not to ignore you Potter. You're nothing more than in my way all the time!" Lily couldn't help it. She got angry with him.

"I want you get to know me Evans!"

"Why should I ever want to get to know you?" She asked angrily. Why she should get to know him was beyond her.

"All I ask for is a chance, Evans, but you never seem to get it!"

"I don't see what there is to get! You're in my way _all_ the time, why don't you understand that I want to be alone!" With that she ran away from him. If he didn't want to leave her alone, then she would leave him.

* * *

Lily ran to the Astronomy tower. She knew it was too early for the couples to come there yet so she was sure she would have the tower all by herself. Inside she found she had right, she was the only one there.

It was strange how well she knew some of Potters habits. She knew that if she ran away from him he usually wouldn't follow her. It felt as if it was an unsaid rule between them. If Lily is running, don't chase her. This was a rule she didn't complain about. Whenever they had had a fight she wanted to be alone, and it was great that he didn't follow her at those times. She didn't want to be more upset than she already was.

* * *

_Panting she stopped in the Astronomy tower. She had been screaming at Potter again. He was such a git! Giving love potion to all of the first years to chase after her was not what she thought about as a fun day in school. Potter and his friends seemed to think differently. _

_She sat down on the stone floor. It was a bit cold, but at the moment she couldn't care less. She had been running through half of the castle to get rid of the first years. As a thirteen year old girl, eleven year olds weren't the perfect age to date. She was so angry!_

_After about ten minutes she heard slow steps coming her way. Not expecting anyone to come she looked up to see who the intruder was. She had calmed down a bit, but that didn't help her as the person causing her anger was the one who was now stepping into the room. _

"_I'm sorry, Evans. I didn't think they would be so stupid," Potter said. He didn't look at her and he seemed rather unsecure where he stood. "When they all captured you and started to show off I got rather scared to tell the truth." _

_And he had looked scared, but not only that. When he had entered the room the first years kept her in he had looked furious. Whether it was with him, or the first years she hadn't been able to tell, but there was no mistake that he had been beyond angry. _

"_I don't know why I did it to tell you the truth. I thought it'd be fun to see what those little bastards would be able to do… now I wish I hadn't." It wasn't hard to tell that he truly regretted his actions. It was the first time Lily had ever seen him so full of regret. She couldn't remember a time where he had regretted anything at all. "From today on I will never let any other boy even lay his eyes on you. Trust me." With that he had walked away, leaving her more confused than she had ever been before._

_

* * *

_

What a memory to remember. It had been three years and Lily could still see the look he had had in his eyes. It didn't help the matters that he had indeed not let any boy near her, except his friends whom he seemed to trust wouldn't lay a finger on her, at least not in _that_ way.

She took the book she had been studying out of her bag and continued her reading from earlier on. The tower was quiet, so she might as well study. At least until she wouldn't be able to ignore the cold stone floor any longer.

When she started to hear distant steps she packed her bag. She had been in the Astronomy tower for some time and the steps told her that soon there would be a couple entering. To her surprise there wasn't a couple entering; Potter was standing in the doorway. He looked full of regret, and he didn't even notice her as he entered.

Lily watched him walk over to one of the windows and sign heavily. She was already standing and ready to go, but she found she didn't want to interrupt him so she sat quietly back down, still looking at him. He was mostly quiet, but from time to time she saw him doing angry movements. As the time went by the movements came fewer and fewer, in the end he sat down beneath the window. He still didn't see her.

Potter was staring blankly in front of him. This confused Lily a bit, she didn't know if it was her reaction or something else that made him become this way, but what she knew was that her legs had fallen asleep and that she truly needed to move soon.

In the end she wasn't able to sit still and she stood up. Potter instantly searched for the sound and he found her at once.

"Evans," he said shocked. "How long have you been here?" Lily saw his eyes glanced around the room but when he didn't find anything his eyes went back on her.

"I'm sorry, what? Oh, I didn't see you there. I'll go now." Lily dismissed herself. She didn't want Potter to know that she had been there all along, so she pretended she'd just arrived and that it was him that hadn't noticed her as she entered. As she made her way out her legs almost bucked beneath her and gave her away.

"Then why, may I ask, do your legs not listen to you?" Potter asked. He had stood up and was walking towards her. His legs must have fallen asleep as well as he stumbled his way towards her. "You've been here for quite some time, haven't you?"

Lily looked down on the stone floor and at that moment she was glad that he couldn't feel how cold her butt was. "Well, what can I say? I like the floor?" Lily asked.

"You amaze me, Lily." Potter said before he walked out of the tower. When he was out the door Lily fell right down on the cold floor again. Due to the fact that her blood circulation wasn't completely back, but more to the fact that he hadn't done anything!

* * *

"Lily, give me your head!"

"Wha-"

"Come here," a couple of strong hands dragged Lily, "now, stand on this spot." The pair of hands took a hold on her head and pushed it down towards the cauldron. "Don't worry, this won't kill you!"

* * *

_The next thing Lily knew was the spinning sensation she felt before her feet landed on the ground in a hallway. Before her stood a girl with fiery red hair, she as a head shorter than Lily herself. The girl was facing towards a boy with raven hair which stood out at the most random angles; he too was a head shorter than Lily. _

"_Potter, stop bothering me!" The little girl screamed. Lily jumped at the sound. She hadn't imagined the little girl to be so full of a temper. Nether had she expected the girl had such a loud voice, the girl seemed so tiny!_

"_Only if you say "yes" to my question!" _

"_Never!" The little girl stormed off, looking more frustrated than what Lily thought possible. _

_Lily then saw a younger version of herself pass right through herself and disappeared at the end of the hallway._

* * *

"Flower!" A hand took a hold on her arm and dragged her towards its owner. "Please…" pleading eyes struggled to catch a hold on hers, "…I need to talk to you."

The other students headed for their class, therefore they were left alone. "What now, Potter. What could possibly be so important that you had to stop me?" Potter looked down on his feet, an unusual act by him. Most days he carried along his self-confidence, which was about the size of the Gryffindor tower. How he managed to drag this tower around with him, Lily had never understood, but now he seemed to have left it somewhere, though it was hard to believe that he could forget his tower –the size and all put into consideration.

It took a few more minutes before he raised his head. He looked at her with big eyes, as if he hadn't expected her to still stand there.

"I, I … I was just wondering… how it went with the drawing, the one of the headmaster I mean." He looked down on his feet again.

* * *

_A young boy was standing in front of her. He was probably just a second year by the looks of it. "Miss Prefect? Could you please read my letter?" Before she managed to do anything else he took her hand and placed a letter there. Then he ran away towards his house. _

_The letter was crumpled as if he had been holding on it for too long and the paper had been shaped after his hand. Lily looked at it more closely and it surprised her how large his hand must have been. She opened the letter and started to read:_

'_Dear Miss Prefect,_

_I have to tell you something I've been thinking about for a while…'_

_

* * *

_

"…How is it going?" Potters voice interrupter her thoughts.

"Oh, sorry I… The headmaster hasn't got time yet."

"I see. My offer still stand you know!" Then he ran away, just like the second year had done the previous year. Though this time it hadn't been a young boy giving her a letter with a confession where the last line was: 'Sorry, it was a Dare!' This time it had been Potter, with his tail between his legs.

* * *

"Guess who!" A pair of hand was in front of her eyes in a second.

"Potter?" Lily teased her friend.

"He he, funny that one, would you rather it be him than me?" The girly voice asked.

"No, Mary, I don't think I would." The girl took her hands away from Lily's eyes, stepped in front of her and smiled.

"I could go get him you know, I don't think he would mind." Not bothering to answer Lily let her friend walk her to the empty classroom they had started to use. Inside there was a pensive. They had used it once before, but how they even got it was a mystery for Lily. It was Mary who had arranged the whole thing, and now there was no turning back.

"Last time you didn't do very well Lily. Today you have to concentrate on Potter, ok?"

Mary, Lily's friend had had this sort of plan. She had forced Lily to agree on the plan before she even knew what it was about. What Mary was trying to do, was to get Lily to understand that Potter actually loved her. Since she had seen it a lot of times before herself, she now wanted Lily to look on the boys' reactions after she had turned her back on him and started go walk away. Mary had noticed that the look changed quite a lot as Lily turned her back to him and that he was too good of an actor to show his real feeling every time Lily said no to him in front of her.

Lily walked in front of the pensive and felt her head being pushed into it.

* * *

"_Evans! I love you!" Lily saw herself standing with her back turned towards the boy. If her memory didn't play tricks with her she was certain that this memory, her friends', was the first time Potter had claimed his love for her. Signing she looked at Potter. Mary would know if she hadn't done as she was told._

_His look surprised her. He almost seemed hurt, but also more desperate than she had ever seen. Taking in the people standing around them Lily found that neither of them seemed to think of it as anything special, and still it was completely new to her. Despite what she would usually do, Lily stepped in front of the memory of Potter, taking in his looks clearer and closer than any time before. _

_She had to bow a little down to be level headed with him. As she looked into his eyes she saw that he was close to tears and they swam with emotions. _

"_I love you… Lily." The old Lily jumped at the sound. She hadn't expected him to talk again. But her old self didn't seem as surprised when she walked over to them and slapped him while angry tears ran down her face. _

"_Don't Potter, don't fool yourself to think that you love me one bit." Then memory Lily walked away, shivering from her anger. _

_Lily waited for the spinning sensation as she thought the memory was finished but when it didn't come she turned towards Potter again. The boy was looking at the spot memory Lily had been standing not so long ago. The tears she had seen there earlier were running freely down his face, but the expression he was wearing she wasn't able to understand. His face was completely blank. Then the spinning sensation came._

_

* * *

_

"Now, what do you think?" Mary asked eagerly.

"I don't know Mary, he didn't show any expressions so what am I to think?"

"He didn't?" Mary asked confused. She then put her head into the pensive to see the memory. "Oh, I had forgotten about that. Sorry Lily, I will show you a better one tomorrow."

* * *

That was chapter one of the together three chapters in this story. I hope you liked this first chapter!

Prongs


	2. Chapter 2

Here is the second chapter for you all! I hope you like it!

Disclaimer: I own nothing!

* * *

Lily was sitting beside the lake, letting her mind flow to wherever. She had finished her test earlier that afternoon and found that she had time for a bit of relaxing. The wind around her was a bit chilly but she didn't mind. To her a perfect autumn afternoon was sitting outside on a blanket, the wind playing with her hair and a cup of warm tea in her hands.

That was how she was sitting now, the tea making her warm in the cold weather. Lily smiled when Mary sat down beside her. She had heard the footsteps and instantly knew who was coming. They sat in silence for a little while, drinking their tea. The girls liked to sit outside together, each brining their own cup of tea and just sit there, enjoying each other's company.

"I remember back in first year," Mary started, looking at Lily, "the first time I found you sitting here."

* * *

_Potter entered the common room and found his friends, "It's starting to get colder now boys, it's quite windy outside as well." The boy didn't look happy about this information. "I can hardly move my fingers from the cold, see!" He shoved his hands, "trust me, you don't want to get a detention outside now." _

_Lily had stood up from her chair, got her coat and walked outside. When she came by the lake she had sat down and looked at the sun while it got lower and lower on the sky, until it set. _

"_Lily? Is that you?" A girl had lit her wand and was walking closer to where Lily sat. "Don't go outside in the dark! I was scared for you; I thought you were lost in the castle!" _

_Mary looked close to tears. She hugged Lily while she cried, soon the tears stopped. "Ok, Mary. I'll tell you next time." Lily promised. They sat there, hugging, keeping each other warm. Then they walked hand in hand back to the castle as the dark frightened the both of them. It wasn't before they were inside their dorm that they sat down on Lily's bed and started to laugh. They both knew that they would soon do it again. _

_

* * *

_

"Yeah, I remember," Lily said. She stood up and held out her hand for her friend to take, "care to walk back to the castle with me?" They both grinned as they walked inside the castle. Not letting the others hand go. Thought, this time they didn't go to their dorm, they went to the classroom they occupied, a memory ready for Lily to see.

* * *

_Lily saw the bag rip open and all the school books falling to the floor. Quills and inkbottles, parchment and all of the other items that were in the bag were lying on the floor. She saw how the younger version of herself quickly fixing the bag and started to sweep all of the things inside it again. _

"_Go out with me?" Lily saw the young Potter standing above herself as he asked the question. _

"_NO!" _

"_Aw, please Evans!" _

"_I already said no, how many times to I have to say it before you get it?" _

"_A lot more my dear, trust me." _

"_No you won't. I'll make sure you stop one day, Potter." The younger version of her stood up and walked away. But as she saw the red hair vanish Lily knew that the memory couldn't be over quite yet. Mary had promised a Potter with expression, but he still hadn't shown any. If she hadn't known what was about to happen she would be surprised by what Potter was doing next, he looked around in the crowd. One girl caught his attention. He walked over to her and started to flirt. The girl then leaned forward and kissed him. _

_At that very moment her old self came back into view again. With big eyes the girl picked up the inkbottle she had forgot earlier. After he had shoved the girl away Lily threw the bottle it at Potter. "I can't believe you! I was away for two minutes and you already found yourself a new girl!" _

"_I… I didn't." The boy mumbled as the young Lily walked away again. Lily could see that the boy regretted what he had done and if it hadn't been for Sirius holding his shoulder he probably would have run after her. _

* * *

"Evans, I was just wondering…"

"I'm sorry," Lily interrupted.

"Sorry for what?" Potter looked at her, his confusion visible. It was then she understood that he might not even remember the scene, or even think of it at the moment. But she had started to speak, so she might as well finish.

"Sorry for yelling at you, the time that girl kissed you after I turned you down." Lily said shyly. Originally she hadn't intended to tell him sorry at all, but when she found it bugged her more than she thought was possible when it had to do with Potter, she found that she had to tell him sorry to get it off of her chest.

"Ah, that! Don't worry about it Flower, it was a long time ago." With that he walked away from her.

His words started to ring in her head: _"Don't worry about it Flower, it was a long time ago.",_ as she walked her way down to the Great Hall. There she didn't notice anyone; his words rang too loudly in her head. What frustrated her the most was that she didn't even know why they glued themselves to her mind.

It wasn't before her stomach started to growl that she was able to think about something else. Lily was sitting in the middle of charms and hadn't been able to take notice of what the teacher had been talking about for the last hour. She looked worriedly over at Mary who sat beside her and smiled when she received a small note.

_Don't worry, I've got you covered._

She wrote a small "thanks" back and relaxed, at least she didn't have to think about all of the notes she hadn't been able to write.

* * *

Lily and Mary sat together eating dinner. They didn't talk together as they were occupied with their eating. Then Lily saw the headmaster walk into the room and sat down on his chair. She continued her eating, though she planned on walking up to him when she finished. As she ate she kept an eye on him, just to be sure that he didn't walk away before she stopped eating.

* * *

"_You know Sirius; I think that is a really good idea!" _ It was as if the young boys appeared in front of her as from a fog.

"_I know! I told you I'm brilliant!" Black grinned. _Lily couldn't help looking at the boys with mesmerized eyes. It was as if they were there, on the empty seats right in front of her, but still they couldn't be there.

_The two boys looked at each other and grinned. Then they started one of their eating competitions they were so found of. They both looked like hungry stray dogs finally finding something to eat. It was fascinating to see how much of the food they managed to stuff into their mouths, they were known as the boys who never spilled any of their food, no matter how much they had on their plate. _

"_Finished!" Black announced. Potter just grinned as he showed his last piece of potato into his mouth. _

"_I'll win next time Sirius," Potter playfully punched his friend in the shoulder, "and you know I always hold my word." _

"_Well see James, I'm fairly confident I've won the most…"Black smiled confidently. _

Then the boys vanished.

* * *

"Mary!" Lily turned to the girl beside her, "I think I'm going mad!"

Lily almost laughed at the face her friend made. Mary looked like she used all of her concentration on chewing as fast as she could, then she swallowed and said, "What do you mean?"

"I just saw Potter and Black!" Marys head turned as she looked around the Great Hall.

"Lily, I can see them too. They just entered."

"I know that too Mary," Lily sighed, "but I just saw the thirteen year old version of them having a food race…"

When Lily looked up to the teachers table she found that the headmaster was no longer present. Stupid Potter, he always made her miss what she wanted to do and he hadn't even been there! How he always managed to ruin her day was beyond her, she left the hall before he could do more harm.

* * *

Sitting in front of the fire after being out in the cold was something Lily enjoyed. She and Mary had taken a walk outside to talk about what Lily had seen. They hadn't come to a conclusion.

She sat there with her eyes closed and listened to the sound of the flames licking the wood. It was a sound she connected to all of the times she had been outside playing on the school grounds, laughing all the way up to the tower, and then being warmed up by the heat of the fire.

* * *

"_Mary!" Lily half shouted at her friend before throwing some snow into Marys face when she turned around. "I got you!"_

"_Lily! I'm going to get you!" Mary said before she got a bit of snow and ran after Lily trying to hit the girl with the snow._

_They had been second years at that time. Their friendship was close and they truly enjoyed each other's company. The day was cold, the new snow light as a feather so they couldn't make any snow balls out of it. They were almost the only ones outside._

"_Girls, can we join you!" A shout came. The girls carried snow with them and walked towards the boys, and then they threw the snow at them before they ran away. _

"_So this means we're in?" Black asked them, a smirk playing on his face. For a reason unknown to Lily she started to smile, something she knew would encourage the boys to start playing their game. What she hadn't known was how much fun it ended up being. _

_

* * *

_

_They had been drinking hot chocolate, while they sat in their pyjamas' tucked under blankets, that evening. It had been one of the few times the two girls and the four boys had got along and been together, with no name calling and no pranks. _

_Potter looked at her, but she didn't mind. They had had too much fun outside for her to let it bother her. And the boys had also got them something to drink, unknown how, but she found that the evening wouldn't have felt completed without it. "Cheers boys, and thank you!" Lily said before taking a sip of her drink. The warm liquid warmed up her body from the inside and she smiled. _

_As she looked over at Mary she saw that the other girl also had a pleased and calm look on her face. Lily looked into the fire while she thought about nothing. All she wanted to do was to enjoy the moment and remember it for the rest of her life. _

_When Potter sat down beside her after he had found another blanked she didn't move. For minutes she just sat there, until she found her eyes burning as she looked into the flames. When Lily turned her head and found Potter sitting close to her and watching her. He was smiling in a pleased way and that was all he had been doing. _

_

* * *

_

Lily felt someone placing a blanket over her shoulders and turned her head to see Mary sitting down beside her. "Let's just sit," Mary said before she looked into the flames, copying Lily.

* * *

She sat at a table in the corner of the common room. Potter and his friends were sitting in their usual seats in front of the fire. They were laughing and playing around. It seemed so strange to Lily how they managed to seem as if they never had any homework, but still they were able to hand in their assignments when they were due.

Lily had just finished the day's load of work and started to draw. It was one of those days she could just sit there drawing, being completely relaxed and concentrating on what she was doing. As she sat there she started to think back on all those times she hadn't felt the need for drawing, but as it captured her, it was hard to understand that it had ever left.

She grew more tired by the minute. When she felt that she no longer could hold her eyes open she found it was time for bed.

* * *

"Evans, I've got a little surprise for you," Black said in a sing song voice. He didn't give her any time to answer before he dragged her out of the common room and down to the classroom she and Mary usually occupied. "I have something to show you…" he said with a mischievous grin. Then he copied Mary and showed her head into the pensive.

* * *

_Lily saw herself from the day before. She sat there, not seeming to have a care in the world. As she already knew what she was doing she looked over at Black, after all, it was his memory. She was taken aback when she saw that he was watching her. His eyes jumped away from his friends and to her yesterday self, then back again. There was something in his eyes saying that he knew something no one else knew about._

_Not knowing where to stand she stood in between the group of boys and herself, facing the boys. When she heard a movement behind her she turned. She saw herself pack her bag and leave the room. Suddenly Black walked past her to the table she had been sitting on. He picked up a piece of paper, looked at it and smiled. Lily stepped beside him to see what he was smiling about. _

_He was holding the drawing she had drawn. It was without doubt Potters profile. She tried to remember what she had been drawing, but she hadn't really taken notice of it. Black walked over to Potter and the others with the drawing. "James, look!" He showed his friend the drawing. _

"_Why do you show me this drawing, Sirius?" Potter asked while he studied the drawing. _

"_It's of you." _

"_I noticed that, but this isn't the first drawing of me I have seen, you out of all should know that perfectly well." Potter said, still looking at the drawing. This fact bothered Lily. If he had seen so many drawings of himself, then why would he take so long looking at this drawing, a drawing she didn't want to declare that she had drawn. "Who made it?" _

_Black smiled mysteriously. "I'm not going to tell you," he said. Potter had yet to look up from the drawing. "It's a secret." It was first then James looked up from the drawing. _

"_You're not telling me?"_

"_No."_

"_Not even a hint?"_

"_No."_

"_But you do know who the artist is?" Black didn't answer. He smiled the way a child smiles when it knows a secret, but don't want to tell._

"_Very well then, but I'll take the drawing." Potter said and stood up. Lily watched him as he walked over to the stairs and almost tripped. He was looking at the drawing all the way up the stairs. _

When she returned to the classroom Lily couldn't find Black. As she wondered why he wasn't there any longer she looked down on her watch, then she started to run.

* * *

Lily sat in her seat, thinking of the strange morning she had had. Not only had Black managed to make her late for class but she hadn't been able to avoid any obstacles in the hallway either.

* * *

_The hallways weren't hallways any longer; they were a blur of colours passing Lily's eyes as she ran. Then it all stopped. Lily crashed into something purple. It was solid and old. She fell to the floor, but somehow the purple didn't move. Lily stood up and apologized. "I'm sorry!" _

"_What is the rush, Miss Evans?" _

"_I was just wondering if I could draw you, sir." The headmaster smiled. _

"_I'm sorry, but I don't have time, maybe next time, Miss Evans." With that the headmaster walked away. _

_Lily understood that the old man had a lot on his plate and that the headmaster had a lot of things to do, but she also knew that as the time went by she would have less and less time to draw the man as the schoolwork became harder and harder. _

_She started to run again. _

* * *

During the day Lily didn't take her eyes away from Black. Not even Potter was able to disturb her staring. She was as determined as she had ever been before. When he stood up together with his mates after they had eaten dinner she stood up and walked towards him. Then she took his sleeve and dragged him out of the Great Hall.

It was raining heavily. Lily was glad there was no wind as she pushed the boy in front of her outside. The grass was soaked, as were their feet soon after. They walked over to the lake and there they stopped.

"Black, where is the drawing?" Lily asked. She didn't bother using a kind tone to him, she was too angry.

"You know that, Lily. James' got it." Sirius said. He didn't look too confortable.

"Why didn't you take it back?"

"Because I don't know where he left it."

"But you're his friend. You could get it at any time!"

"I could. But where's the fun in that? This is your problem Evans," Sirius smirked, "besides Evans, do you honestly think that James will let me go through his stuff whenever I want to?"

"But I… you could have asked him! I'm sure he would have let you get it."

"As I said, Evans; where's the fun it that?" Lily desperately tried to find something to say. How could a friend of Potter, the best friend, outgo her in a fight this easily? "Why should I take the drawing away from James anyway?" Black asked suspiciously.

"Because it is my drawing!"

"You know what they say, Evans: The finder's the keeper."

"But you know that I made it. You know that I only forgot it!" Lily shouted.

"How would I know you forgot it, to me you could have left it there you know."

"I…" Lily didn't know what to say. If she thought about it she knew that Black was perfectly right. It was hard to accept this truth, but she did. "I need your help to get it back." Lily looked at him with serious eyes.

After a minute Black looked at her; "I'm going to ask you to do something, and I don't think you will like it." He was no longer smiling and he seemed determined that his plan was the only way to do things. If it had been any other time Lily wouldn't have even considered trusting him, but this time she knew she had to. She nodded, telling him that she accepted his plan, before she asked him a question:

"You haven't told that I am the artist of the drawing, have you?"

"No," Black assured her, "I wouldn't let the fun of teasing James go away from me, would I now?"

Lily smiled at that. There was only one Sirius Black.

* * *

Please r&r!

Prongs


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I own nothing!

* * *

Lily didn't like stairs. They had always had something against her. They made her trip, both upwards and downwards. They were never soft to land on and always turned their backs on her; hard, sharp-edged, backs.

She found them being nice to her after they got used to another, but this time it was different. They didn't know each other and they had only met once before.

* * *

_They had always been there, but they were never meant for her. Lily looked at the students sitting around in the common room. There were few of them, and to her displeasure they were all girls. How all of the boys happened to be outside of the common room at once amused her, but it didn't help her now. Since she had no one to help her, she had to walk up the stairs herself. Slowly and carefully, like an old woman on ice, she took one step at a time. _

_When she finally reached the top she let out her breath. She had been holding it on her way up, afraid that her breathing could cause her to fall. _

_Lily stepped in front of the door leading to the fifth year boy's dorm. She knocked. There came no answer. After her second knock she heard some movements from the inside and heard a voice call out: "The door is open!" Slowly she took the door handle and pushed it open. _

"_Oh, Lily! I didn't know it was you. Sit down on this bed and I'll be back in a minute." Remus said as he found some clothes. Taken aback by the fact that her fellow prefect was standing half naked in front of her Lily sat down on the bed and waited. _

_Lily looked around the dorm. It was cleaner than she had imagined. Remus had told her to sit on the cleanest of the beds. It seemed as if the person hadn't had time to make it dirty again after the house elves had cleaned the room. _

_Remus walked over to the nearest bed and sat down. "What did you want Lily?" he asked, smiling. _

"_Well, you see, the girls in my dorm want to have this pyjama party tonight and they told me I had to attend. Therefore I was wondering if it was ok for you to walk the rounds alone tonight." Lily asked shyly. _

_Remus grinned at her. "So little Miss Prefect is going to attend a pyjama party…" he said jokingly. _

"_Seems like it," Lily answered smiling. "I do know how to have a good time you know."_

_Remus looked at her. "Ok, I'll ask one of the boys to go with me instead." _

_As she walked over to the door Remus followed her. "Thank you!" she said after she had opened the door. Then she gave him a hug. _

_The unfriendly stairs forgotten she walked away with full speed. Halfway down she tripped and landed into a couple of arms. They were holding her tightly. "I'm sorry," she said to her rescuer. The arms let her go and she saw that it was Potter standing in front of her. "Bye," she said before she walked away. For some reason she knew that Potter had seen the hug and that he wasn't very pleased about it. _

_

* * *

_

Lily felt like a spy as she carefully tip toed up the stairs. She felt that these stairs remembered her, but she didn't want to take any chances. Though this time she had let herself breathe as she was more confident that she wouldn't trip. When she finally reached the top stair she started to wonder about this plan Sirius had had, and she couldn't really come up with any ideas of why he couldn't do it himself. But they had decided that she was the one who had to do it and since she was already in front of the dorm she might as well stick to the plan.

She entered the dorm as quietly as she could. Then she looked around inside of it to be sure there were no one else in the room. There weren't. Following Sirius' instructions she walked over to the bed that had to be James'. There she found a teddy bear lying. It was quite worn out. Lily felt sorry for it; after all it had to lie beside Potter every night.

Lily found it strange that Sirius didn't even know where his friends had laid the drawing. Thinking about where she herself might have put it, she looked under his pillow. It wasn't there. Instead she found a picture she thought she had lost. It was of herself, probably in third year, smiling to her parents who had been standing on the other side of the camera, taking the picture. She laid it back down and let the pillow cover it yet again. If she took it Potter would know that she had been there and that was a fact she didn't want him to know.

Not even thinking about what she did, Lily lay down on the bed. It was just as comfortable as her bed, thought it smelled a little different. She also found that she liked his pillow a bit better than hers, for unknown reasons.

She sat up a bit and let her eyes wander around his things. They stopped on his bedside table. It was full of pictures. Of Potter, his family, but also his friends, and some people she didn't know. There were no space left for anything more. As she looked on the pictures she laid down on his pillow again, wondering how it was for him to fall asleep looking at the pictures. Her eyes widened when she saw it. Her drawing was placed in the middle of all the pictures, and the only way to see it was from the position she was in.

Carefully she took the top of the parchment and took the drawing. She placed the drawing in her pocket and walked over to the door. Slowly she opened it and glanced outside. There was no one there. Lily quickly walked over to the stairs and started to climb down.

* * *

"_What is that?" _

"_It's a pencil Potter. It is something that muggles write with." _

"_Why, don't they have quills?" The eleven year old asked. _

"_They have stopped using them, now they either use a pencil or a pen," Lily looked at the boy's questioning face, "a pen is almost like a quill, but the ink is inside of the pen, therefore muggles don't need inkbottles." _

"_What about the … thing you holding in your hand, what is so special about that?" Lily laughed a bit at his tone. He sounded almost as she had offended him, and she had only talked about something as common as a pen. _

"_You can erase what you have written by using a rubber. That way you don't need to use a new parchment every time you write a mistake." She simply told him. His expression changed from immature stubbornness to excitement. _

"_Can I try it?" He asked in what Lily thought was the tone he used when he wanted something and knew he would get what he wanted._

"_No." _

"_Please, just once?" Potter looked at her with pleading eyes. _

"_Fine." She gave him the smallest pencil she had and the worst rubber. "Here, try these out." _

_The next day Professor McGonagall had been given an assignment with no words scratched over. It was written in grey and it was Potter who had given it to her. She had taken five points away from him for not using ink, but had smiled when she read through it. Lily had found this fascinating, but hadn't tried to copy him. _

_

* * *

_

On her way down Lily saw that Potter was on his way up. She showed him her business face as she walked past him and down to the common room where she sat down beside Mary, glad she hadn't tripped. She didn't want him to think that she had been there for any other reason than her prefect duties. He didn't stop her, so her plan must have worked.

"Hello, Mary," Lily said as she sat down.

"Lily, why did you just come down the boy staircase?" Mary asked her.

"No reason," Lily answered looking over at the stairs. Potter was gone. She looked around in the room and spotted Sirius. He looked at her and she smiled at him, the smile telling him she had the drawing. He gave her a small smile in return.

Mary didn't ask her further, but Lily knew they would have to talk about it sometime. It wasn't the first time Lily had avoided a subject and Mary had seemed to let it go, until she had suddenly asked about it again.

* * *

Lily smiled as she felt Mary's hand on her back, guiding her. It wasn't hard to know where they were going, the route to the classroom starting to become a habit for Lily. Though she wasn't facing her friend she started talking. Some of the students gave them weird looks; Lily was talking to Mary as if the girl was a stranger tying to kidnap her. She even started to talk to a third year.

"Hi, could you tell my kidnapper here that I want to go down for dinner?" The boy had looked at her as if she was crazy, making Lily and Mary laugh.

There was hardly anyone of their co students who knew about this little game the girls liked to play, though they had been doing it for years.

* * *

_Lily walked up behind her friend. "Mary, pretend that you don't know who it is behind you," she said while putting her hand on her friends back. _

_"You know, since I don't know you are I can't tell you a secret I have been wishing to tell someone for a while," Mary said. Lily laughed. She had thought that Mary would play her game with her, and she was pleased that the girl did so. _

_"So you don't want to tell me your secret..." Lily mumbled, more to herself than to Mary, though she made sure the girl heard her. "Well I wouldn't be so confident on that. I'm known to be quite the pursuer." They both laughed. _

_"Evans, I need to talk to you." Potter's voice spoke behind them. _

_"I don't have time to talk to you now Potter, don't you see that I'm kidnapping this lovely girl?" _

_"I don't know what you are on about, Evans, but I know that you have a free period now and that I need to talk to you." He had followed them all the way up to the Gryffindor common room. _

_"What if I don't want to talk to you?" Lily asked him. _

_"You have to," he said before he took her by the shoulder and dragged her away. Before any of the girls were able to react they couldn't see each other any longer. _

_"Where are you taking me?" Lily asked. Potter just smiled at her and continued dragging her with him. _

_"I don't want to talk to you right now!" Lily told him. She wanted to play her new game with Mary. "I have homework to do!"_

_"No you don't," said Potter and Lily knew he was right. She had finished her homework the day before and she knew he had seen her tell Mary that small fact. _

_"Evans," he tried to look her in the eye, but she thought that if she wasn't allowed by him to play her game with Mary, then she would play it with him. She gave him a small smile and started her act. _

_"What is it now, Mr Kidnapper? I have more important things to do than talk to you right now." She gave him a look that said she was clueless about who he was. _

_"Evans, I don't have time for this now." _

_"Really, well I'll just go now then," Lily said before she walked away leaving Potter in the hallway. _

* * *

While Mary still guided her, Lily started to talk about what had happened the previous day. For some unknown reason she felt that she had to talk about it and now was better than never.

"I'm glad I did it absentmindedly, thought I wish I hadn't done it at all. Still I don't know what would have happened if I knew who I was drawing…" Lily rambled. Though she once had promised herself that she shouldn't draw the boy, she had now done it. All she could hope of now was that Sirius wouldn't tell his friend, if he did, she didn't know what could happen. But what would happen –she didn't even want to think about it.

Mary gave her a knowing smile but didn't say anything. Instead she led the way to their classroom where Lily knew she would be asked to see yet another memory. When she ducked into the pensive she had a feeling that she wouldn't like what she was about to see. There had been something about Marys' smile which made her think so. Mary never smiled like that, never.

* * *

_Upon seeing which memory she was inside Lily made a surprised noise. Mary had only been showing her old memories, most time she had been a head taller than her old self. This time it was different. This memory had happened only a few days back. Now she saw details she hadn't been able to see at the time, details happening behind her back._

_Lily couldn't understand how she still hadn't learned that she needed to see what was going on behind her; after all, Mary had showed her several memories stating the fact. She saw herself walking down the stairs where she met Potter. Lily walked closer to the stairs, that way she could observe what was happening more closely. She put all of her concentration on Potter, as she remembered quite clearly what she herself had been doing. _

_After the memory of her had walked past him, he stopped. His face had once again changed in a matter of seconds. He looked sad as he turned after her. His arm lifted and was about to reach after her, but he stopped himself. A moment later she was out of reach. By the time she had come to the bottom of the stairs he was gone. This time she hadn't needed to be up close to see what was happening. Anyone in the common room could easily see what was going on. Yet again Lily had been the only one who didn't know. _

_

* * *

_

"Mary, why didn't you tell me?" Lily asked. For some reason she didn't know it hurt her that no one had told her about how sad Potter had looked. Though there was hardly anyone seeing it, she couldn't help but wonder what had caused him his pain. For the first time since she had started to observe him through Marys' memories, she started to wonder if she might be the cause of his hurt.

* * *

James Potter had walked past her in the hall. He had stopped for a few seconds, his eyes looking at hers, and then he had smiled before he continued to walk away from her. Lily had tried to do her homework for an hour, but she all she could think about was 'why had he smiled at her?' It wasn't like him. If he stopped her he always tried to speak a few words with her before he continued walking, but now _he just smiled!_

Lily decided it was better to take a break from her homework and take a walk instead while she tried to clear her mind. But as she walked she continued to think about Potter. It had just been the other day when she had thought she had hurt him, and now he smiled at her. She felt guilty she had hurt him, but his smile seemed so kind. It was as if he didn't really hold a grudge on her even after all this time and all of the things she had said to him. Why he didn't show any hard feeling towards her was a mystery she didn't think she could solve all on her own.

It was then she started to think of another mystery she didn't know the answer to; why didn't Dumbledore have time for her to draw him? She had seen him talking to a Professor or even students from time to time, but whenever she asked him for his time he didn't seem to have it. Though it was understandable that the man didn't have time, it frustrated her.

* * *

"Mary, where did you get the pensive?" Lily asked her friend. She had come back from her walk and decided that she wanted to get some answers as she herself only came up with more questions the more she thought about it. How Mary had found the pensive had been her third mystery. She sat down in front of her friend, expecting their conversation to take a while.

The girl looked down on her hands before she looked Lily in the eye, and act she usually only did when she had a confession to make.

"I got it from Dumbledore, Lily."

Suddenly Lily stood up from her chair, her brain had somehow thought up a reason for their headmaster to dismiss her all of those times. Lily smiled. "I need you to come with me Mary," she said before she picked up a piece of parchment and a quill excited.

Together they ran to the classroom as Lily wanted to get there as fast as possible. Lily found her memory and let in sink into the pensive. She then looked at Mary's questioning face. "I'm going to draw Dumbledore now, Mary. You want to come along?" The girl nodded and together they went to see Lily's memory. It was also the first time they looked at a memory together.

* * *

_They stood beside the young Lily and her parents. Lily saw that the young version of her was soon finished with the drawing she was making and she knew that the girl would soon look around and spot Dumbledore. She looked in the direction she knew the headmaster was supposed to be and wasn't surprised when she saw him sitting there and didn't even find it odd that the man was looking at the small Lily. _

"_Mary, the headmaster is sitting on the bench over there," Lily told her friend, "I'm going to sit beside myself and draw him now, feel free to look around in my memory, we've got about fifteen minutes or so before I have to be finished with the drawing." _

_It was strange to sit beside oneself thought Lily as she sat down on the blanket. She grinned when she saw the old one taking his eyes of the little redhead and relaxing his body in a new position, turning slightly away from the girls. Both of the Lily's began to draw the man. As she was drawing Lily felt the sun warm her up and she felt calm sitting with her parents in the familiar park. When Mary sat down beside her she didn't need to see to know. Lily was surrounded by the people she loved the most. _

_

* * *

_

_She finished her drawing a few minutes before the young one and she stood up. Lily wanted to look around in the park and she noticed that the bushes had grown a lot since she was eight years old. There were other families there as well; families she hadn't noticed when this memory had taken place. A few meters away there was a small family, the parents' seemed a bit old and the young boy ran around with a lot of energy, much to his parents' amusement. _

"_Mary, look at the boy over there, it looks as if he is playing that he is on a broom." And that was exactly what he did. Finding it funny the girls walked over to the family before the memory ended. _

"…_and Potter is in the air, holding the Quaffle, he is flying faster than all of the other players! He makes himself ready to shoot and he SCHORES!" Both of the girls looked at on another. Could this be the Potter they knew? _

"_James, there's no need to scream. What if the muggles hear you?" The mother said. She was still smiling. Potter seemed sulky for a moment before he said: "they won't understand what I'm talking about anyways, they might even think I thought of this game myself," before he continued, his smile back on his face._

_Lily and Mary started to laugh. This was the Potter they knew and to see that he resembled himself from the age of eight made them laugh even harder. Then the memory was over. _

_

* * *

_

"I think I'll head up to the headmaster now, is that all right?" Lily smiled when Mary nodded. The girl was still laughing form seeing the young Potter and Lily couldn't help but laugh a little more as well.

* * *

Lily said the password to the headmasters' office and stood on the moving stair. Soon she was in front of the door and she knocked. "Come in," she heard a voice coming from inside of the room. "Ah, Miss Evans, what can I do for you?" he asked. Lily walked over to him, stopping in front of his desk.

"It's about the drawing."

"I'm sorry Miss Evans; I still haven't found time for you to draw me." The headmaster said with a kind voice.

Lily smiled and handed him the parchment she was holding in her hand. "You don't need to worry about fining time for me to draw you any longer, professor. I have finished my promise," she said looking at him as he looked down at the drawing.

"I see your skills have improved, Miss Evans. Thank you for the drawing." He smiled. With a flick of his want it hung besides the old drawing. Lily could easily see that the two drawings looked quite alike; some of the lines were still the same as they had been. With that she walked out of the office.

* * *

Later that evening Lily sat in the common room as Potter entered. He was laughing. Lily still felt guilty for making him hurt and she wanted to do something to please him as weird as it sounded.

It was then she remembered how he had acted about the drawing, though he didn't know she had been the one making it. Lily thought that since he wanted her to draw him and she had taken her old drawing back, she might as well draw him again. She stood up and said with a loud voice so that the whole common room heard her she say:

"Potter, do you want me to draw you?"

* * *

And that was the last chapter of this story! Thank you for reading!

Prongs (Oh, and I have to give Padfoot some credit as well as I got a bit of help on this story. Thank you Pads!)


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